Yes, Christmas has come and gone again. This was my 62nd Christmas. If I were to allow myself a little melodrama I would wonder how many I had left. I want though for the future isn’t mine. I am only allowed to live in the present and see back to yesterday.

That in itself has never seemed very important to me. It has taken on a whole new meaning in the last couple of years though. My dad has Alzheimer and his past is slowly closing into a dark hole. Each day the hole seems to grow smaller. I am afraid soon he will no longer remember me.

If you don’t remember yesterday how in the world can you look forward to tomorrow. Perhaps that is one way we are different from the animals.

Any way I have tried my best to get in the Christmas spirit this year. Since Thanksgiving I have done everything I could think of. Then this morning on the way to work I felt it. I smiled and thought only one day late. Maybe that is how my dad feels. He just can’t quiet pull up enough of the past to look forward to the future.

This leaves him stuck in the moment. He neither knows for sure where he has been nor where he is going. My anchor, my rock is dissolving before my eyes.

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6 Comments on “COME AND GONE”

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  2. Gail Says:

    I Understand……Take a Deep Breath….Tell your Dad that you love him and be there for him…he may get very childlike as his condition progresses…love him just the same and be there for him as much as you can…you will be very glad you did…..

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